This blog post was brought to my attention earlier and it really bugs me. Like, really really bugs me.

http://applesandbandaidsblog.com/2014/06/11/my-husband-doesnt-need-to-see-your-boobs/

  The idea that we have to protect our husbands, and to put the responsibility of protecting our husbands upon other women and the way they dress is terrible. Terrible!

 It reduces men to creatures incapable of self control. It assumes their attitude automatically objectifies women. It takes away from the trust and love that should be within a marriage because it says "Don't trust yout husband. He's a dirty pig who can't not think about women's bodies. He lets those bodies come in between the two of you. Don't trust him." And a lack of faith chips away at love more than anything else can.

 Have faith in your husbands, ladies.

 I was going to just post this without taking an actually obtained male opinion into consideration. I was going to just speak for my husband, but then I thought better. So I called him at work and asked him, much to his amusement, questions with answers I already knew.

When he sees women in bikinis on his feed, does he stop and stare?

 No.

(It barely registers)

 Does he think about them after, at any point? While having sex with me, maybe? While at work and desperately needing something to lust after?

 No.

(he even snickered at the idea)

Does he wish I could have thinner legs, be less stretch-marked, have a flatter belly?

No.

(I'm the most beautiful woman he knows of)

Men may be visual creatures, but they, not their wiring, are who chooses what to do with the imagery in front of them. They choose whether or not it comes into their marriage. You help choose whether those images come in between you and your husband with YOUR attitude. Because when you feel a need to chase after your husband to make sure he knows that there are "stumbling blocks" all over social media as if you're his keeper, you degrade him as a person and YOU objectify the women you feel are the stumbling blocks.

 Because women were ogled and lusted after when we dressed like this:

(Picture found on http://www.fanpop.com/clubs/victorian-era/images/10709164/title/victorian-era-photo)


 We, the wives, women, put more attention toward other women dressed "immodestly" than do men. We give more thought to them then our husbands do.

You're the one thinking about them for days after. A guy might look once but he controls whether or not he looks twice and the way he thinks after. But wives have a hand in that in making it a big deal.

Men are capable of controlling themselves. Their minds. Their attitude toward women. The attitude that lets a man NOT objectify a woman based on what she's wearing is what we should be aiming for, not making women cover up to protect a grown man from himself. Because a man who ogles a woman in her bikini will ogle her in a modest skirt and tee shirt. Women on the beach do not equate to porn. Other women aren't stumbling blocks to your marriage because of their attire. The stumbling blocks are maybe real things, but they're in you, in your husband. In your attitudes.